I guess I’m not there yet.. I still cringe a little when I see it being done.
And whenever I try to do it myself, I feel like I am being an imposter or a huge poser.
Maybe it’s just me…maybe I like to speak more properly. Or maybe i’m going back to the days when black people told me I was acting white, because I didn’t speak like them.
I remember being little and trying to fit in, and fellow black people would look at me and laugh. They’d say “stay white, hun, just stay being white.”
Whatever though, one day I will be completely comfortable in my skin.
One day I’ll stop concerning myself with what bullies and jerks have said or will say.
From my experience, there is a middle period there. There was a long time where I was trying to take back AAVE and people mocked me because I sounded funny and shit, and it was a whole thing.
But it passes and trust me, the whole “I just like to speak more properly” thing is an issue of arrogance and it does pass. There is a complicated, not-white-sanctioned beauty in AAVE and when you realize it, you wanna use it all the time.
I was going to say the same thing to this, basically — I was also at that point in transitioning from whiteness to owning/loving my Blackness. I definitely used to feel a jolt of awkwardness and silliness when I’d began first speaking in AAVE/less “white”. People began to notice (i.e. my white friends) and would mock me for it, or worse, think they could start speaking that way, too.
Once I dropped that arrogance of being perceived as less intelligent/proper if I used AAVE, it became easier, more natural, and was responded to by the right people with welcomes of sameness. I remember how hard it was for me to ever say ‘nigga’ in casual conversation between myself and another Black person. I used to look over my shoulder to make sure no one was about to shout at me for it, lol.
But using AAVE/slang is just such a normal part of my speech now that I can comfortably flip between it and standard English like it’s nothing and I enjoy being so bi-lingual, for lack of a better expression.
Agreed…once you let the whole “OMG I SOUND SO TERRIBLE!!!” thing go, it becomes much easier, and honestly? I started speaking it fluently again before I even realized it. Simple as that.
Just give it time.
I’m working on it too. I think in AAVE more often but am still hesitant to say things aloud for fear of being mocked and whatnot.
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