woman-of-wonder:

frottage-cheese:

My idea of heaven consists of all the things I would go to hell for.

This is actually the most accurate thing I’ve seen all day

(Source: enochnochjoke, via missfreudianslit)

westendblues:

Why are books so damn expensive? Got me tryna perfect my old shoplifting techniques.

osamah:

*slowly realizes my hand is in my pants*

All the damn time.

(via markapolis)

crackerhell:

yepppppppp

(Source: crazypandas)

harleyhendrix:

I just wanna be licked from the back & choked a lil bit read my bible & praise the lord. Hallelujah hollaback yall. Amen.

heartcramp:

Look, if you nicely tell me that swearing makes you uncomfortable and you politely ask me not to, I will stop immediately and speak nicer than a nun.

But if you start acting like you’re on some fucking high horse, or telling me that I’m going to Hell for talking the way that I do and you can’t “be around that kind of language” then you can bet your motherfuckin’ ass that I’ll be fucking cussing like a cunt-fuckin’ sailor you maggot-ridden piece of dick.

(via missfreudianslit)

(Source: bipolarowl, via fuckyeahbipolarowl)

kevvn:

you ever had to call someone and get annoyed when they actually answer?

(via bad-dominicana)

(Source: bipolarowl, via fuckyeahbipolarowl)